id3a3 f3y6i 3t8f9 85y7k kt4e9 enryt h7287 kdz88 7zs65 r5za2 8kf3s f77zr r7id5 fr85n 73akt 64kr4 akdfa zn8sa k872a 36sz2 7sk75 I'm scared that It's not POCD and that i'm just in denial. | OCD : Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

I'm scared that It's not POCD and that i'm just in denial.

Having POCD, e.g. OCD about being a pedophile, does not mean someone actually has pedophilic thoughts, it's an obsessive fear of having those thoughts or being that thing. Likewise HOCD does not mean you have homosexual thoughts or anything against homosexuality, it's just a fear of being something you're not - an identity crisis, more than ...

2022.01.21 16:49 Miserable_Stuff_33 I'm scared that It's not POCD and that i'm just in denial.

So this goes quite deep and I don't know if i'm welcome here considering why I starded feeling bad. Also sorry, it's alot of texts.
So i'm a 17 year old male, and the whole year of 2021 has been hell. Almost every day has been shitty, some days have of course been quite nice but the majority has been on the bad side. Also i'm not saying all this because I want people to feel bad for me, I just want to speek about it with people I don't know. But what happend was when I was around 16 years old. I was an extremely horny teen, I jerked off 2-3 times a day and I used to skip lessons to jerk off in the school toilets plenty of times, but that lead to some problems with me and I spent alot of time on omegle (for some reasons you might understand). I found a girl I started trading nudes with, the problem being that she said she was 12. I didn't force her to send me anything nor did I think about doing that. But it went on for some time. Then I blocked her. Another incident happend when I chatted with a 14 year old girl, we never exchanged pictures but I know I wanted us to do that. But after all this I had just watched a video about a pedophile youtuber that had done “similair things”. And that's were it started. I added her again on an alternative account to say that i'm sorry. Again, I didn't force her to do anything but that doesn't really matter alot to people. I'm not going to explain what I want to do in the future because I want to be anynomous but recently has been the worst. I have been feeling bad about this because of many reasons. One of them is that I feel like I don't deserve to do what I want and that I deserve to feel like this. And one of the things I feel bad about is being scared of being a pedophile, all of these things I feel bad about shift around, so everytime I start feeling better about one thing, I start feeling bad about another. But i'm scared that I was doing it because of her age, when i've talked to people about this i've said that I did it because I got to see private parts from a girl and not because of her age. Reading this and thinking that I did this absolutely disgusts me. But I feel like I didn't do it because of what I tell people, I have memories of me thinking that I liked it because of her age (I know this is something that pedophiles say, but she looked older) and that I found it sexually pleasing. But now my mind keeps going back and forwards (This may be a very confusing part and sound very stupid) because recently I've been thinking that I find certain "numbers" sexually pleasing, that may sound weird but when I think about it it feels like there's some truth to that. When I've watched porn when I was younger I've felt it sexually pleasing thinking of certain "age numbers". Not that I find the age sexually pleasing but more the number in the age. Sometimes I find numbers like "19" and "26" just as sexually pleasing. Maybe it's ageplay i'm into without knowing it? But when I think back to before I started feeling scared about this I've never felt like i've found the looks of a child sexually pleasing. When I talked about finding the looks of a child sexually pleasing I feel disturbed because I feel like I do find it Sexually pleasing, it really disturbs me. And I know that's a symptom of pocd (that you have thoughts that disturb you), but I don't find the concept of pedophilia very disturbing, especially when i'm depressed, but that in it self disturbs me. But when I think about pedophilia and what it means it disgusts me. It's super confusing and I hate it. Sometimes I feel like the right answer is that I'm actually a pedophile because I feel like my thoughts are real. Maybe i've already wrote about this but when I think about a child and I try to think of it sexually I don't know I find the concept of it disturbing or if I find it disturbing that I'm thinking about it. Sometimes I feel like my thoughts are real and that I'm a pedophile, it just feels so real and I'm just scared, and I feel like if I actually am a pedophile there's nothing more for me to live for. Maybe I deserve feeling like this and being scared because of what I did.
Sorry about it being so long, maybe I've forgotten about some parts because it's just to much to think of it all. And sorry if i'm not welcome here, not trying to sound like i'm a victim, I just don't have many places where I can talk about this
submitted by Miserable_Stuff_33 to OCDRecovery [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 VulpesTheFoxx a kinda different AC Valhalla Review! (light spoilers)

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2022.01.21 16:49 essen11 I'm An Immature Astronom

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2022.01.21 16:49 uwu_iykyk Lonely KP nights

Lonely KP nights submitted by uwu_iykyk to PublicDoggingPerth [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 MrMartinos Would you rather

Would you rather submitted by MrMartinos to DarkViperAU [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 Cultural_Bager There is official Starfinder video coming out

As the title says there is no Starfinder video game coming out. A comment from the Paizo pr manager is in the original thread saying as much.
submitted by Cultural_Bager to starfinder_rpg [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 DavaiDavaiKurwa QC - NIKE SACAI - 230Y

QC - NIKE SACAI - 230Y submitted by DavaiDavaiKurwa to FrenchReps [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 spacemanspiff1614 Suggestions for a week-long trip on the US East Coast?

My wife and I both managed to get a week off in April. We decided to rent a car and just drive somewhere for a week.
We're in NYC now, and we're both from New England, so we want to go somewhere we've never travelled to before, but we've only got a week. Our original plan was to just drive out to Utah, but that would be like six days of nonstop driving there and back pretty much, so we decided we should stick to the East Coast. Any suggestions on trips we could do in a week? We've travelled pretty extensively throughout New England and are looking southward. Cheers!
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2022.01.21 16:49 SoupOrJuice13 Advice on making IRL friends?

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2022.01.21 16:49 Allyalsen Phase meter Denon sc6000m

Hey!
So I have a problem with my phase meters, they don't seem to be in sync on my 2 players.
The phase meter on the active layer on player 1 is very often different from player 2, even if I'm only using 1 layer on both players.
For example right now I'm standing in front of my two players, and only player 1 has a track on, and still both phase meters is moving on that player is moving like I had 2 tracks on. But on my second player it's only one of the phase meters moving, correctly so. When I'm starting the incoming track on player 2, the phase meter is correct, but phase meter on player 1 is still off.
Anyone know what's the deal with this and how to fix it? :)
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2022.01.21 16:49 ob1bsmokin1 Haven't played in a year

I'm getting vr sickness extremely bad, tried all the things that used to help i.e. fan, ginger smoke, tapping my foot while moving. Nothings helping an I have a literal butt ton of games.. trying to forget some things an get out of this place for a while. Any recommendations or ideas. Want to play but damn 15 minutes yesterday made me hella quezzy an tired.. 10 minutes today an my brain/back hurts all the way down to the tailbone.
submitted by ob1bsmokin1 to PSVR [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 Shiftayoung How do you deal with seeing an attractive woman when out with your wife?

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2022.01.21 16:49 tardiscoder Guest Returning Covid Tests?

Are we really accepting covid tests as returns? This seems like an extra hazard for TM's at Guest Service and Receiving.
submitted by tardiscoder to Target [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 ekvannoy Feeling ridiculously cute in my new matching fit! Everglade green scuba HR joggers (6) and oversized scuba half zip (xs/s).

Feeling ridiculously cute in my new matching fit! Everglade green scuba HR joggers (6) and oversized scuba half zip (xs/s). submitted by ekvannoy to lululemon [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 nekrodomus ¿A quién pertenece el número 960301685? te lo contamos todo

¿A quién pertenece el número 960301685? te lo contamos todo submitted by nekrodomus to noticiasdetecnologia [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 scoopdy_poopdy_pants PSA: Regarding Logitech (and maybe other) Pedals on Carpet

Don't know why it took me almost 10 years to finally get serious about finding a solution to my Saitek (now Logitech) Pro Flight Combat Rudder Pedals sliding around on carpet...I just bought these and stuck them to the bottom, and they're working incredibly well. I've tried industrial-grade Velcro, and other "solutions" but nothing has worked quite this well.
Anyway, might be obvious or not a problem for most, but I figure this could help at least one other person.
Blue skies ahead!
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2022.01.21 16:49 Usual_Evening_4792 I have been banned from your discord.

How can I get out of being banned in Discord poap ??
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2022.01.21 16:49 wolf_momma Best car wash?

Any recommendations for a good car wash place under $25? I recently got a new job that gives a monthly $$ for car washes. Looking for best bang for buck, preferably not a wash that is just the wooosh tunnel with the spinning rags but open if people speak highly of one in particular.
(Closer to raleigh the better)
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2022.01.21 16:49 moto_bl0nda Beautiful sunset 🌅

Beautiful sunset 🌅 submitted by moto_bl0nda to selfie [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 Ok_Ship7491 A at Loyola LA!

Status checker went decision rendered yesterday and just got the email!
Applied 12/6 UR 1/10
16high,3.7mid,nURM
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2022.01.21 16:49 lonelyraddishfarmer This picture of a storm while on an oil rig

This picture of a storm while on an oil rig submitted by lonelyraddishfarmer to Damnthatsinteresting [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 BoxOfSnoo K14 - autosleep time?

I tried to set my K14 auto-sleep to longer value, but it never seems to work. Anyone else? I have tried fn1+S+L+T and fn1+S+L+Y and it always seems to be 10 minutes no matter what I do.
Could it be fn2? Do I have to press the keys sequentially instead of all at the same time? Does it reset to 10 minutes as soon as it goes to sleep?
Thanks for any hints.
submitted by BoxOfSnoo to Keychron [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 AlexW___ Opinion on Cobra Kai

Since everyone in this sub it extremely biased towards their MA I just wanted to ask about opinions on the show. Do y'all enjoy watching the show or do you hate it because they get some MA stuff wrong or they're not showing BJJ or wrestling or whatever? In my opinion, it's making martial arts very popular and I like it overall. And btw this isn't an attack to get downvoted i am generally curious because of some of the things y'all fight about sometimes.
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2022.01.21 16:49 TruthToPower77 Make this happen

Make this happen submitted by TruthToPower77 to WhitePeopleTwitter [link] [comments]


2022.01.21 16:49 AromaticEquipment876 Parking

I have two friends coming to visit this weekend and they are driving. Where should I tell them to park? Can they park somewhere on campus?
submitted by AromaticEquipment876 to notredame [link] [comments]


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